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Children fare better when expectations on them are clear and firm.

If you are headed in the wrong direction as a parent - you are allowed to make a U-turn.

Adolescence can be the cruelest place on earth. It can really be heartless.  ( Tori Amos)

Good parenting requires sacrifice. Childhood lasts for only a few brief years , but it should be given priority while it is passing before your eyes

Hurt people hurt people.

If it  was going to be easy to raise kids, it never would have started with something called "labour".

"Cutting" is a visible sign to the world that you are hurting.

The more 2 parents differ in their approaches to discipline, the more likely it leads to trouble for the child.

When a child is disregulated - is the time parents need to be regulated.

The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

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Tactics for Temper Tantrums (part 8)




Sometimes nothing works. And sometimes for reasons of sheer equality or common sense or both, the parent finds it necessary to concede. After all, we’re not our childlren’s adversaries; we’re their advocates. Sometimes, both interests are seerved by giving in. Giving in to a tantrum now and then will not foster a juvenile delinquent. Is the damage done by one extra cookie worth half an hour of wear and tear on both of you? Have you been unreasonable in the first place, demanding too much and thus contributing to the scene?

Sometimes a parent realizes soon after making a request of stating a vehement “No, you can’t!” that the request is unreasonable or the desired compliance goes beyond a fair expectation for this child. Now comes the dilemma. Should I stick to my guns, and make the point that when I say something, I mean it even if I now realize that what I have asked is dumb? Am I going to give in eventually anyway? The key is timing. If you know that sooner or later you are going to relent, then relent now. The more time that passes in the tandtrum scene, the more reinforcement the child receives for the idea that persistence does pay off. The child may perceive that there are rewards to the one who can lhold out the longest.

Most parents feel that if they give their instincts a chance, they can sense the times when it is best to give in, just as they can sense the times when they must maintain control.

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+ Behaviour Management

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you [...]

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+ Lick Your Kids

  “Lick Your Kids” (figuratively not literally) (2 hours) First [...]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain [...]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ Taming a Toddler

Many parents wonder what hit them when their sweet little baby turns into an unreasonable toddler – ideas for dealing with mealtime, bedtime, temper tanturms, toilet training, noncompliance, etc.

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2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca


Parents' Comments

“We are foster parents who took in a 13 year old girl (going on 18!) and she ran us through the wringer. Rick helped us learn how to set limits that made the difference.”

(G.E. – Strathroy)