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We should not medicate the boys so they fit the school; we should change the school to fit the boy. (Leonard Sax, M.D. Ph.D)

"Unexpressed feeling never die. They are buried alive and come back later in ugly ways." (Stephen Covey)

Children mimic well. They catch what they see better than they follow what they hear.

"Cutting" is a visible sign to the world that you are hurting.

Parents are the external regulator for kids who cannot regulate themselves.

Setting limits teaches your children valuable skills they will use the rest of their lives. One day, they will report to a job where their ability to follow rules will dictate their success.

"Moody" and "unpredictable" are adjectives parents will often use when referring to their teenagers.

Being a parent of a teenager can cure a person of narcissism.

The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice. (Peggy O'Mara)

Good parenting requires sacrifice. Childhood lasts for only a few brief years , but it should be given priority while it is passing before your eyes

Children today are under enormous pressures rarely experienced by their parents or grandparents. Many of today's children are being enticed to grow up too quickly and are encountering challenges for which they are totally unprepared.

If you (parents) tend to overreact to your child's misbehaviour - your child learns that he can't trust you. Mom, Dad, stay regulated!

Hurt people hurt people.

Parenting style matters - a lot!

The mistake that Sharon and I both made is we never set any boundaries.  (Ozzy Osbourne)

A tantruming toddler is a little ball of writhing muscle and incredible strength. It's like trying to carry a greased pig past a slop bucket.

It's more effective to reward your child for being "good" (appropriate) than to punish him for being "bad" (inappropriate).

The more 2 parents differ in their approaches to discipline, the more likely it leads to trouble for the child.

When a child is disregulated - is the time parents need to be regulated.

"The thing that impresses me most about North America is the way parents obey their children"    (King Edward VII , 1841-1910)

The teenage years require a delicate balance between the young person's need to gain independence, and the parent's need to retain authority.

It is what we say and do when we're angry that creates the very model our children will follow when dealing with their own frustrations.

Don't wait for him to turn 10 before you reveal that you are not in fact the hired help whose job it is to clean up after him.

If it  was going to be easy to raise kids, it never would have started with something called "labour".

Children fare better when expectations on them are clear and firm.

Many clinicians find it easier to tell parents their child has a brain-based disorder than suggest parenting changes. Jennifer Harris (psychiatrist)

If there is no relationship - nothing else matters !

Wouldn't it be nice if children would simply listen and learn.

Adolescence can be the cruelest place on earth. It can really be heartless.  ( Tori Amos)

"Parents aren't the cause of ADHD, but they are part of the solution." (Kenny Handleman, M.D.)

There has been an explosion in the prescribing of medication for very young children, particularly preschool and kindergarten boys (Juli Zito , Univ. of Maryland)

Children do not develop on their own - they only develop within relationships.

If you are headed in the wrong direction as a parent - you are allowed to make a U-turn.

You cannot reason with someone who is being unreasonable.

The quickest way to change your child’s behaviour is to first change your own.

Simple rules adhered to when children are young can prevent more serious problems later.

"To be a man, a boy must see a man."  (J.R. Moehringer)

Criticism is not a motivator.

The best inheritance  parents can give their children is a few minutes of their time each day.

Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

Early intervention is always better than crisis management - but it is never too late to do the right thing.

Some hope their children will be like sponges soaking up the truth and wisdom imparted by their parents. However appealing this philosophy might be, it seldom seems to catch on with their children.

Removing a child from a traumatic environment does not remove the trauma from the child's memory.

The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

Whining and crying are employed by kids for the purpose of getting something. If it works, then it was worth the effort and will be repeated.

Learn more.

Links

These are helpful resources for your family:

Online:

www.kidsmentalhealth.ca

www.abacuslist.ca

www.adoption.on.ca

Suggested Reading:

The Explosive Child by Ross W. Green Ph.D.

The Boy Who Was Raised As a Dog by Bruce Perry M.D.

Bringing Up Boys by James Dobson Ph.D.

1-2-3 Magic by Thomas Phelan Ph.D.

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you [...]

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+ Lick Your Kids

  “Lick Your Kids” (figuratively not literally) (2 hours) First [...]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain [...]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ Taming a Toddler

Many parents wonder what hit them when their sweet little baby turns into an unreasonable toddler – ideas for dealing with mealtime, bedtime, temper tanturms, toilet training, noncompliance, etc.

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“He is a wealth of knowledge coupled with first hand experience.”

(E.K. – London)