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Don't wait for him to turn 10 before you reveal that you are not in fact the hired help whose job it is to clean up after him.

If you (parents) tend to overreact to your child's misbehaviour - your child learns that he can't trust you. Mom, Dad, stay regulated!

"To be a man, a boy must see a man."  (J.R. Moehringer)

We should not medicate the boys so they fit the school; we should change the school to fit the boy. (Leonard Sax, M.D. Ph.D)

Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

Wouldn't it be nice if children would simply listen and learn.

Parents are the external regulator for kids who cannot regulate themselves.

Parenting style matters - a lot!

"Cutting" is a visible sign to the world that you are hurting.

Children fare better when expectations on them are clear and firm.

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Tactics for Temper Tantrums (part 10)

 

 

Determine the Type of Tantrum

Tantrums come in 2 varieties: “development” and “manipulative. The terrible two’s is all about the “developmental” type. These are typically very intense as the child literally has lost control of himself. With increasing age, this type usually gives way to the “manipulative” tantrum that typically has less intensity and more of a conscious, planned quality. It is not always easy to distinguish between the two types. The reaction of the parent is sometimes a clue as to what type of tantrum the child is having because with a “developmental” tantrum we tend to feel a little sorry for the child. A “manipulative” tantrum tends to make us feel angry.

The “developmental” type requires understanding and involvement – the child cannot control himself. The “manipulative” type is done to control the adult and it’s sole purpose is for the child to get his way. T
his kid MUST not win this type of tantrum.

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ Lick Your Kids

  “Lick Your Kids” (figuratively not literally) (2 hours) First […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ Taming a Toddler

Many parents wonder what hit them when their sweet little baby turns into an unreasonable toddler – ideas for dealing with mealtime, bedtime, temper tanturms, toilet training, noncompliance, etc.

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Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“We are foster parents who took in a 13 year old girl (going on 18!) and she ran us through the wringer. Rick helped us learn how to set limits that made the difference.”

(G.E. – Strathroy)