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Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

Children fare better when expectations on them are clear and firm.

The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

Simple rules adhered to when children are young can prevent more serious problems later.

"Cutting" is a visible sign to the world that you are hurting.

You cannot reason with someone who is being unreasonable.

"Parents aren't the cause of ADHD, but they are part of the solution." (Kenny Handleman, M.D.)

Children do not develop on their own - they only develop within relationships.

Criticism is not a motivator.

If you (parents) tend to overreact to your child's misbehaviour - your child learns that he can't trust you. Mom, Dad, stay regulated!

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Tactics for Temper Tantrums (part 10)

 

 

Determine the Type of Tantrum

Tantrums come in 2 varieties: “development” and “manipulative. The terrible two’s is all about the “developmental” type. These are typically very intense as the child literally has lost control of himself. With increasing age, this type usually gives way to the “manipulative” tantrum that typically has less intensity and more of a conscious, planned quality. It is not always easy to distinguish between the two types. The reaction of the parent is sometimes a clue as to what type of tantrum the child is having because with a “developmental” tantrum we tend to feel a little sorry for the child. A “manipulative” tantrum tends to make us feel angry.

The “developmental” type requires understanding and involvement – the child cannot control himself. The “manipulative” type is done to control the adult and it’s sole purpose is for the child to get his way. T
his kid MUST not win this type of tantrum.

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ Lick Your Kids

  “Lick Your Kids” (figuratively not literally) (2 hours) First […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ Taming a Toddler

Many parents wonder what hit them when their sweet little baby turns into an unreasonable toddler – ideas for dealing with mealtime, bedtime, temper tanturms, toilet training, noncompliance, etc.

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Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“We are foster parents who took in a 13 year old girl (going on 18!) and she ran us through the wringer. Rick helped us learn how to set limits that made the difference.”

(G.E. – Strathroy)