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It's more effective to reward your child for being "good" (appropriate) than to punish him for being "bad" (inappropriate).

Hurt people hurt people.

Children fare better when expectations on them are clear and firm.

Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

Whining and crying are employed by kids for the purpose of getting something. If it works, then it was worth the effort and will be repeated.

A tantruming toddler is a little ball of writhing muscle and incredible strength. It's like trying to carry a greased pig past a slop bucket.

The mistake that Sharon and I both made is we never set any boundaries.  (Ozzy Osbourne)

Children do not develop on their own - they only develop within relationships.

Don't wait for him to turn 10 before you reveal that you are not in fact the hired help whose job it is to clean up after him.

Parenting style matters - a lot!

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Question to Behavioural Management Systems

 

We have an 8 month old daughter who is very fussy. She cries whenever I put her down and won’t stop until I pick her up again. This happens all day long. I’m getting real tired of it. Please help me.

Answer:

Crying is your babies form of communicating. It is how she lets you know she is hungry, wet, dirty , tired, etc. It is vitally important that you respond appropriately to legitimate cries for help. However, it is possible to create a fussy, demanding baby by responding every time she cries. Babies are fully capable of learning how to manipulate mom and dad. When a new born infants cries parents need to respond and attempt to find the source of discomfort and resolve it. By the time a child is 8 months old, most parents can tell if a cry is communicating genuine distress or simply a desire to be picked up . Picking up an 8 month old baby every time she cries is teaching her a lesson you do not want her to learn. Do not be afraid to let an 8 month old baby cry for a reasonable amount of time when you know by the tone that there is no significant problem that needs to be resolved. You  want the child to learn how to self soothe and responding immediately to an OLDER baby’s every whimper is counter productive.

 

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“Our daughter was the joy of our life until she turned 13, then all hell broke loose. Rick helped us understand what was happening to her and we made some adjustments that helped us get through it. She’s now in University and doing well.”

(D.A. – St. Thomas)