welcome image

It's more effective to reward your child for being "good" (appropriate) than to punish him for being "bad" (inappropriate).

The mistake that Sharon and I both made is we never set any boundaries.  (Ozzy Osbourne)

If it  was going to be easy to raise kids, it never would have started with something called "labour".

Children do not develop on their own - they only develop within relationships.

Early intervention is always better than crisis management - but it is never too late to do the right thing.

If you (parents) tend to overreact to your child's misbehaviour - your child learns that he can't trust you. Mom, Dad, stay regulated!

Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

Parenting style matters - a lot!

The best inheritance  parents can give their children is a few minutes of their time each day.

If you are headed in the wrong direction as a parent - you are allowed to make a U-turn.

Learn more.

Consequencing Teenagers

Identifying and following through on appropriate consequences is a major part of the job description for parents of teenagers. A consequence for inappropriate behaviour typically involves one of two options:

a) removing a desirable (example – removal of computer privileges)

b) adding an undesirable (example – adding a chore)

Removing something the teen wants is usually more effective and easier to administer and monitor than adding something he/she doesn’t want. An effective consequence must involve something that matters to the teen. In my experience, it is better to remove the privilege for a “shorter” time rather than a “longer” time and if the teen hasn’t learned his/her lesson, you can remove the privilege again and again.

Your teenager may say “I don’t care!” – this usually means they do care, they just don’t want you to know (hoping you will give up). Parents, just hang in there.

Examples of consequences that matter to most teens:

– removing privileges

– grounding

– phone restrictions

– removing cell phone

– restrict instant messaging (software available to do this)

– restrict driving privileges

– restrict access to TV, computer, music, electronic games

Back to Top

Workshops

+ Behaviour Management

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

Learn more

+ Lick Your Kids

  “Lick Your Kids” (figuratively not literally) (2 hours) First […]

Learn more

+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

Learn more

+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

Learn more

+ Taming a Toddler

Many parents wonder what hit them when their sweet little baby turns into an unreasonable toddler – ideas for dealing with mealtime, bedtime, temper tanturms, toilet training, noncompliance, etc.

Learn more

See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

Archive


Parents' Comments

“Our psychiatrist recommended Rick to help us sort out behaviour management issues for our autistic son. He was an invaluable help.”

(C.C. – Sarnia)