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The teenage years require a delicate balance between the young person's need to gain independence, and the parent's need to retain authority.

Adolescence can be the cruelest place on earth. It can really be heartless.  ( Tori Amos)

It is what we say and do when we're angry that creates the very model our children will follow when dealing with their own frustrations.

"Rules without relationship leads to rebellion" (Josh McDowell)

"Cutting" is a visible sign to the world that you are hurting.

Some hope their children will be like sponges soaking up the truth and wisdom imparted by their parents. However appealing this philosophy might be, it seldom seems to catch on with their children.

Setting limits teaches your children valuable skills they will use the rest of their lives. One day, they will report to a job where their ability to follow rules will dictate their success.

The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

"The thing that impresses me most about North America is the way parents obey their children"    (King Edward VII , 1841-1910)

Don't wait for him to turn 10 before you reveal that you are not in fact the hired help whose job it is to clean up after him.

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What Does a Child With ADHD Look Like?

It is not unusual for children to forget their homework, act impulsively or fidget at the dinner table. but children with ADHD are particularly prone to these types of behaviour. It can be however, difficult to distinguish between ADHD and normal childhood tendencies. If you identify a few of the following traits or  the symptoms only occur in some situations, it’s probably not ADHD. However if you see a number of symptoms in different situations, it would be a wise decision to have an evaluation by a qualified professional.

Symptoms

  • can’t sit still
  • impulsive
  • distractible
  • distracting
  • inattentive
  • disregard rules
  • doesn’t seem to learn from mistakes
  • major school problems
  • causes stress within families
  • few friends – “bugs” others
  • punishments and rewards seem ineffective
  • noncompliant
  • extreme mood swings
  • few inhibitions
  • dreamer
  • fidgets
  • noisy , talks excessively
  • fingers, legs constantly wiggling
  • interrupts conversations
  • invades others space
  • asks irrelevant questions
  • others view child as disrespectful, needy
  • blurts out answers
  • can’t wait
  • difficulty finishing assignments
  • disorganized
  • “careless” mistakes
  • procrastinations
  • forgetful
  • squirming
  • running and climbing when it is inappropriate
  • loud
  • always on the go
  • trouble participating in sedentary activities (ie. circle time at school)
  • impatient
  • difficulty delaying gratification
  • unaware of danger
  • not listening to instructions

It is vitally important to remember that your child is not doing these behaviours on purpose. They are happening because of the way his/her brain is working. Help is available for the child and parents.

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“We are foster parents who took in a 13 year old girl (going on 18!) and she ran us through the wringer. Rick helped us learn how to set limits that made the difference.”

(G.E. – Strathroy)