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You cannot reason with someone who is being unreasonable.

"The thing that impresses me most about North America is the way parents obey their children"    (King Edward VII , 1841-1910)

Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

"Rules without relationship leads to rebellion" (Josh McDowell)

The mistake that Sharon and I both made is we never set any boundaries.  (Ozzy Osbourne)

If you (parents) tend to overreact to your child's misbehaviour - your child learns that he can't trust you. Mom, Dad, stay regulated!

"Moody" and "unpredictable" are adjectives parents will often use when referring to their teenagers.

It is what we say and do when we're angry that creates the very model our children will follow when dealing with their own frustrations.

We should not medicate the boys so they fit the school; we should change the school to fit the boy. (Leonard Sax, M.D. Ph.D)

Don't wait for him to turn 10 before you reveal that you are not in fact the hired help whose job it is to clean up after him.

Learn more.

Meeting with Concerned Parents in Toronto

I recently had an invitation to visit a church community north of Toronto to share some ideas with a small group of parents who are concerned about choices their teenagers are making. I outlined the 5 conventional approaches to dealing with these kinds of issues (medical, biochemical. counselling, skills acquisition, behavioural) and explained the strengths and weaknesses of each. It is probable in each one of these families that the best approach would be to combine several of them but no matter how you combine them, you will be using the behavioural approach because all it means is what is the best way to respond to an inappropriate behaviour.

There is nothing more powerful than an idea.

Rick Harper of Behavioural Management Systems has been providing ideas to parents for over 40 years.

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“We were so naive. We thought our son’s poor behaviour was just a phase he was passing through. Thankfully you led us ‘out of the wilderness'”

(N.S. – London)