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Parents are the external regulator for kids who cannot regulate themselves.

Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

Don't wait for him to turn 10 before you reveal that you are not in fact the hired help whose job it is to clean up after him.

Criticism is not a motivator.

When a child is disregulated - is the time parents need to be regulated.

Some hope their children will be like sponges soaking up the truth and wisdom imparted by their parents. However appealing this philosophy might be, it seldom seems to catch on with their children.

Children fare better when expectations on them are clear and firm.

Adolescence can be the cruelest place on earth. It can really be heartless.  ( Tori Amos)

Whining and crying are employed by kids for the purpose of getting something. If it works, then it was worth the effort and will be repeated.

If there is no relationship - nothing else matters !

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Parenting a FASD Toddler

The main developmental tasks for a toddler are:

– to learn he is a separate person

– to learn his body is his own

– to learn his ideas and feelings have value

Life becomes increasingly frustrating for the toddler as the demands and expectations placed on him increase. He will discover that he is unable to do many of the things he wants to do himself eg. feed, dress himself, etc.)

Guidelines for toddlers with FASD

  • consistency, routine and help remain paramount
  • caregiving can begin to be shared by a few others
  • daycare can provide relief
  • power struggles begin to emerge (the “terrible two’s”)
  • normal household expectations can be overwhelming(eg. clean the playroom)
  • FASD toddler behaviour problems begin to be a major source of conflict with siblings
  • your anger and lectures are useless management tools
  • natural and logical consequences have limited success
  • gear all opportunities for success
  • structure, routine, consistency & repetition are key tools
  • works best if FASD child is the youngest in the home

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“We are foster parents who took in a 13 year old girl (going on 18!) and she ran us through the wringer. Rick helped us learn how to set limits that made the difference.”

(G.E. – Strathroy)