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"The thing that impresses me most about North America is the way parents obey their children"    (King Edward VII , 1841-1910)

Some hope their children will be like sponges soaking up the truth and wisdom imparted by their parents. However appealing this philosophy might be, it seldom seems to catch on with their children.

"Parents aren't the cause of ADHD, but they are part of the solution." (Kenny Handleman, M.D.)

If it  was going to be easy to raise kids, it never would have started with something called "labour".

It is what we say and do when we're angry that creates the very model our children will follow when dealing with their own frustrations.

Parents are the external regulator for kids who cannot regulate themselves.

Whining and crying are employed by kids for the purpose of getting something. If it works, then it was worth the effort and will be repeated.

If you are headed in the wrong direction as a parent - you are allowed to make a U-turn.

The best inheritance  parents can give their children is a few minutes of their time each day.

The teenage years require a delicate balance between the young person's need to gain independence, and the parent's need to retain authority.

Learn more.

Asperger’s Syndrome (part 1)

 

 


I recently had an opportunity to meet with a school staff regarding a young boy who is having a tough time. He is doing OK academically but his “odd” social skills result in him being bullied and manipulated by his classmates. He becomes angry and lashes out and problems snowball from there.

I am not a doctor but as the teachers described this boy’s behaviour, I became suspicious that he may have disorder called Asperger’s Syndrome. My recommedation was that it would be advisable to suggest to the boy’s parents to have a qualified medical doctor assess the boy. If in fact he does have Aspergers then the school and the parents need to address this boys problems differently than they have been doing.

Below is an incomplete list of characteristics commonly seen in individuals with Aspergers:

  • average to above average intelligence
  • perceived by others as being “odd”, “eccentric”
  • socially naive
  • often taken advantage of, rejected, bullied
  • unaware of other’s thoughts, feelings or perceptions resulting in appearing rude or      inconsiderate
  • difficulty in initiating and maintaining close relationships & friends despite desiring to do so
  • problems reading non verbal or social cues and understanding social rules
  • inappropriate or insensitive social behaviours
  • will play with others but “on his/her terms” or not at all
  • literal interpretation of communication from others – eg. “I have a splitting headache”
  • speech is used primarily for delivering information or requesting something (not as a way of interacting socially)
  • inability to small talk – one sided conversations
  • long winded about his favourite topic
  • may sound like a little professor
  • uses repetitive phrases
  • detail oriented – may miss the big picture
  • superior ability to focus on favoured areas of interest
  • exaggerated emotional response to situations (eg. temper tantrums, crying)
  • hyper sensitive to sensory input (sound, light, smell, touch, taste)
  • difficulty “connecting the dots” of life
  • rigid, inflexible and rule bound behaviours
  • often anxious and/or depressed
  • poor organizational skills
  • clumsy or awkward motor skills
  • dyslexia, writing problems

My next post will present info regarding diagnosis, treatment and what parents can do.

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+ Behaviour Management

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ Lick Your Kids

  “Lick Your Kids” (figuratively not literally) (2 hours) First […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ Taming a Toddler

Many parents wonder what hit them when their sweet little baby turns into an unreasonable toddler – ideas for dealing with mealtime, bedtime, temper tanturms, toilet training, noncompliance, etc.

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2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“Our psychiatrist recommended Rick to help us sort out behaviour management issues for our autistic son. He was an invaluable help.”

(C.C. – Sarnia)