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The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice. (Peggy O'Mara)

Being a parent of a teenager can cure a person of narcissism.

Children today are under enormous pressures rarely experienced by their parents or grandparents. Many of today's children are being enticed to grow up too quickly and are encountering challenges for which they are totally unprepared.

Wouldn't it be nice if children would simply listen and learn.

We should not medicate the boys so they fit the school; we should change the school to fit the boy. (Leonard Sax, M.D. Ph.D)

Criticism is not a motivator.

"The thing that impresses me most about North America is the way parents obey their children"    (King Edward VII , 1841-1910)

Children fare better when expectations on them are clear and firm.

The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

Children mimic well. They catch what they see better than they follow what they hear.

Learn more.

Asperger’s Syndrome (part 1)

 

 


I recently had an opportunity to meet with a school staff regarding a young boy who is having a tough time. He is doing OK academically but his “odd” social skills result in him being bullied and manipulated by his classmates. He becomes angry and lashes out and problems snowball from there.

I am not a doctor but as the teachers described this boy’s behaviour, I became suspicious that he may have disorder called Asperger’s Syndrome. My recommedation was that it would be advisable to suggest to the boy’s parents to have a qualified medical doctor assess the boy. If in fact he does have Aspergers then the school and the parents need to address this boys problems differently than they have been doing.

Below is an incomplete list of characteristics commonly seen in individuals with Aspergers:

  • average to above average intelligence
  • perceived by others as being “odd”, “eccentric”
  • socially naive
  • often taken advantage of, rejected, bullied
  • unaware of other’s thoughts, feelings or perceptions resulting in appearing rude or      inconsiderate
  • difficulty in initiating and maintaining close relationships & friends despite desiring to do so
  • problems reading non verbal or social cues and understanding social rules
  • inappropriate or insensitive social behaviours
  • will play with others but “on his/her terms” or not at all
  • literal interpretation of communication from others – eg. “I have a splitting headache”
  • speech is used primarily for delivering information or requesting something (not as a way of interacting socially)
  • inability to small talk – one sided conversations
  • long winded about his favourite topic
  • may sound like a little professor
  • uses repetitive phrases
  • detail oriented – may miss the big picture
  • superior ability to focus on favoured areas of interest
  • exaggerated emotional response to situations (eg. temper tantrums, crying)
  • hyper sensitive to sensory input (sound, light, smell, touch, taste)
  • difficulty “connecting the dots” of life
  • rigid, inflexible and rule bound behaviours
  • often anxious and/or depressed
  • poor organizational skills
  • clumsy or awkward motor skills
  • dyslexia, writing problems

My next post will present info regarding diagnosis, treatment and what parents can do.

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NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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