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Removing a child from a traumatic environment does not remove the trauma from the child's memory.

It's more effective to reward your child for being "good" (appropriate) than to punish him for being "bad" (inappropriate).

If you (parents) tend to overreact to your child's misbehaviour - your child learns that he can't trust you. Mom, Dad, stay regulated!

Don't wait for him to turn 10 before you reveal that you are not in fact the hired help whose job it is to clean up after him.

The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

Criticism is not a motivator.

If you are headed in the wrong direction as a parent - you are allowed to make a U-turn.

A tantruming toddler is a little ball of writhing muscle and incredible strength. It's like trying to carry a greased pig past a slop bucket.

The best inheritance  parents can give their children is a few minutes of their time each day.

Children today are under enormous pressures rarely experienced by their parents or grandparents. Many of today's children are being enticed to grow up too quickly and are encountering challenges for which they are totally unprepared.

Learn more.

Arguing

 

 
 
 
 
 
ARGUING

 

 A child can only argue with someone who is willing to argue with him.

 Children only argue with adults who take the bait.

CONTROLLING ARGUING

When he/she starts to argue

1. give him a choice: “either stay her and stop arguing”

OR

“go someplace else in the house and argue with yourself

no yelling, no anger, no time-out, no arguing

– you are giving him a choice with wide parameters

(if he continues arguing and he probably will)

 

 2. take away his best previous choice (“staying here” and replace it with a less preferable one): – “either go someplace else and argue”

OR

“go to your room”

– no yelling, anger or arguing

you are continuing to give choices but the parameters are becoming narrower

(if he continues)

3. keep taking away the best option and replace it with a less preferable option:– “either go to your room

OR

“time out”

4. other options

OR      “no TV”

“ fine”

“take away a treasure”

“withdrawal of privileges”

Our hope is that the child will learn to make good decisions for himself – or you will !


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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ Lick Your Kids

  “Lick Your Kids” (figuratively not literally) (2 hours) First […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ Taming a Toddler

Many parents wonder what hit them when their sweet little baby turns into an unreasonable toddler – ideas for dealing with mealtime, bedtime, temper tanturms, toilet training, noncompliance, etc.

Learn more

See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“We are foster parents who took in a 13 year old girl (going on 18!) and she ran us through the wringer. Rick helped us learn how to set limits that made the difference.”

(G.E. – Strathroy)