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Setting limits teaches your children valuable skills they will use the rest of their lives. One day, they will report to a job where their ability to follow rules will dictate their success.

Whining and crying are employed by kids for the purpose of getting something. If it works, then it was worth the effort and will be repeated.

Removing a child from a traumatic environment does not remove the trauma from the child's memory.

Children fare better when expectations on them are clear and firm.

We should not medicate the boys so they fit the school; we should change the school to fit the boy. (Leonard Sax, M.D. Ph.D)

"Parents aren't the cause of ADHD, but they are part of the solution." (Kenny Handleman, M.D.)

Parents are the external regulator for kids who cannot regulate themselves.

Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

Children mimic well. They catch what they see better than they follow what they hear.

Learn more.

Arguing

 

 
 
 
 
 
ARGUING

 

 A child can only argue with someone who is willing to argue with him.

 Children only argue with adults who take the bait.

CONTROLLING ARGUING

When he/she starts to argue

1. give him a choice: “either stay her and stop arguing”

OR

“go someplace else in the house and argue with yourself

no yelling, no anger, no time-out, no arguing

– you are giving him a choice with wide parameters

(if he continues arguing and he probably will)

 

 2. take away his best previous choice (“staying here” and replace it with a less preferable one): – “either go someplace else and argue”

OR

“go to your room”

– no yelling, anger or arguing

you are continuing to give choices but the parameters are becoming narrower

(if he continues)

3. keep taking away the best option and replace it with a less preferable option:– “either go to your room

OR

“time out”

4. other options

OR      “no TV”

“ fine”

“take away a treasure”

“withdrawal of privileges”

Our hope is that the child will learn to make good decisions for himself – or you will !


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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ Lick Your Kids

  “Lick Your Kids” (figuratively not literally) (2 hours) First […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ Taming a Toddler

Many parents wonder what hit them when their sweet little baby turns into an unreasonable toddler – ideas for dealing with mealtime, bedtime, temper tanturms, toilet training, noncompliance, etc.

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“Our psychiatrist recommended Rick to help us sort out behaviour management issues for our autistic son. He was an invaluable help.”

(C.C. – Sarnia)