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It is what we say and do when we're angry that creates the very model our children will follow when dealing with their own frustrations.

"Parents aren't the cause of ADHD, but they are part of the solution." (Kenny Handleman, M.D.)

"Moody" and "unpredictable" are adjectives parents will often use when referring to their teenagers.

When a child is disregulated - is the time parents need to be regulated.

Children fare better when expectations on them are clear and firm.

"Rules without relationship leads to rebellion" (Josh McDowell)

Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

If there is no relationship - nothing else matters !

The teenage years require a delicate balance between the young person's need to gain independence, and the parent's need to retain authority.

Removing a child from a traumatic environment does not remove the trauma from the child's memory.

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The “Behavioural” Approach

The behavioural approach to managing children involves the application of learning principles identified by famous psychologists such as Pavlov, Thorndike, Skinner, Wolpe and Bandura. Each one of these individuals and countless others described strategies that increased desired behaviours, decreased undesired behaviours or taught new behaviours. These behaviour pioneers stressed the importance of direct observation and carefully analyzing the nature of the child’s behaviour in terms of “what is the kid trying to achieve?”.

Once the behaviours have been clearly defined and the “function” of the behaviour has been determined it is a relatively small step to determining intervention strategies to change the frequency, rate, intensity or duration of the behaviours.

The central premise of the behaviourists is that individuals repeat behaviours that “work” for them and abandon behaviours that “do not work”. An individual who performs a certain behaviour repeatedly is somehow being reinforced for the behaviour. If this were not so, he would not be repeating the behaviour.

The focus of the behaviourist approach in dealing with behaviour  is to develop responses  to the behaviour in a manner likely to reduce the probability of an inappropriate  behaviour being repeated and likely increasing the probability of an appropriate behaviour being repeated. The advantage of this approach is that it provides parents and teachers with direct applications for the home and classroom settings. In fact the main agent for change will be the people who spend the most time with the child (parents & teachers) rather than the therapist who may only see the child at scheduled appointment times.

 

 

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“Our daughter was the joy of our life until she turned 13, then all hell broke loose. Rick helped us understand what was happening to her and we made some adjustments that helped us get through it. She’s now in University and doing well.”

(D.A. – St. Thomas)