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Parents are the external regulator for kids who cannot regulate themselves.

If you (parents) tend to overreact to your child's misbehaviour - your child learns that he can't trust you. Mom, Dad, stay regulated!

Whining and crying are employed by kids for the purpose of getting something. If it works, then it was worth the effort and will be repeated.

If you are headed in the wrong direction as a parent - you are allowed to make a U-turn.

Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

"Moody" and "unpredictable" are adjectives parents will often use when referring to their teenagers.

"To be a man, a boy must see a man."  (J.R. Moehringer)

When a child is disregulated - is the time parents need to be regulated.

"The thing that impresses me most about North America is the way parents obey their children"    (King Edward VII , 1841-1910)

Children today are under enormous pressures rarely experienced by their parents or grandparents. Many of today's children are being enticed to grow up too quickly and are encountering challenges for which they are totally unprepared.

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Temper Tantrums

 

 

 

 

“Temper tantrums come in all shapes and sizes, various decibel levels , and a myriad of duration spans. There are vertical temper tantrums, characterized by foot stomping and yelling; horizontal tantrums, in which the child beats or flails arms and legs in furious motions; and total body tantrums, where the child begins screeching in a vertical stance, then dashes herself to the floor and beats hands and feet in a synchronized chaos of jerks and thuds.

Whatever method the child chooses, there are several truisms regarding tantrums:

1. they happen to everyone

2. they are a predictable part of a child’s development

3. they are  unpredictable as to specific time , place and cause

4. the underlying cause may be as minor as a mother’s denial of a second piece of cake or as major as deciding from

which side of the car to exit

5. the length of tantrum endurance of the tantrummer (child) always far exceeds that of the tantrummee (parent)

Most tantrums from young children occur for the following reason. The child, usually beginning at about 2 years old, is beginning to learn the skills (and the difficulties) of decision making. And he is beginning to sense and assert a little spark inside that flickers with that wonderful feeling of independence. This, in itself, makes not getting one’s way extremely unnerving to the child. But he’s not verbal yet, rather, a physical being in everything he does. Thus we have the tantrum – an effective way to let emotions loose, vent all frustration, and shout “I’m me!” all at the same time.

“That’s fine,” we parents say. We understand. If understanding is the first plateau of tantrum solving, then the second is a veritable Mt. Everest. We still have to live through it.”       (source unknown)

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ Lick Your Kids

  “Lick Your Kids” (figuratively not literally) (2 hours) First […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ Taming a Toddler

Many parents wonder what hit them when their sweet little baby turns into an unreasonable toddler – ideas for dealing with mealtime, bedtime, temper tanturms, toilet training, noncompliance, etc.

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“You have changed our life! Thanks, it needed changing!”

(T.N. – London)