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Children fare better when expectations on them are clear and firm.

Children mimic well. They catch what they see better than they follow what they hear.

Children do not develop on their own - they only develop within relationships.

Simple rules adhered to when children are young can prevent more serious problems later.

A tantruming toddler is a little ball of writhing muscle and incredible strength. It's like trying to carry a greased pig past a slop bucket.

Don't wait for him to turn 10 before you reveal that you are not in fact the hired help whose job it is to clean up after him.

The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

Criticism is not a motivator.

We should not medicate the boys so they fit the school; we should change the school to fit the boy. (Leonard Sax, M.D. Ph.D)

It is what we say and do when we're angry that creates the very model our children will follow when dealing with their own frustrations.

Learn more.

Sleep Problems (part 2)

Sleep Facts

  1. Children differ in their ability to sleep

– some are excellent at birth and throughout their childhood (lucky you)

– some are inherently more susceptible  to disrupted sleep patterns

– it is normal for everyone (adults & children) to have brief wakenings during the night                                                     (most only last a few seconds or minutes and we go right back to sleep)

2. Sleep provides a restorative function for the body and the brain.

3. There are distinct stages of sleep:

a) nonREM (non rapid eye movement)

– restorative functions of sleep occur

– 4 different levels ranging from drowsiness to very deep

– lie quietly, very relaxed

– unlikely to dream

– usually in the first hours of sleep

b) REM sleep (rapid eye movement)

– brain waves become very busy

– usually later portion of sleep period

– heart and breathing rate becomes irregular

– blood pressure increases

– males have penile erection

– small twitches, body movement

– dream state

– temperature of the brain increases

Failure to get sufficient amounts of sleep at  these various stages   result in significant problems in physical and mental development. It also puts tremendous strain on parents and I frequently hear comments such as these from parents:

“I’m at the end of my rope.”

” We are at out wits end”.

” I’m totally exhausted”.

Some common sleep issues with children:

  • bedtime resistors
  • inability to fall asleep
  • frequently waking in night – unable to return to sleep
  • waking too early/ late
  • falling asleep too early in evening
  • snoring
  • bedwetting
  • nightmares / night terrors
  • sleep walking

Subsequent posts will deal with a number of these problems.

Rick Harper has been providing ideas to parents for over 40 years.

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This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“Implementing Rick’s techniques and adhering to them is exhausting, but it is a healthy exhaustion rather than the detrimental exhaustion I used to experience.”

(B.F. – Woodstock)