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The quickest way to change your child’s behaviour is to first change your own.

Children do not develop on their own - they only develop within relationships.

Setting limits teaches your children valuable skills they will use the rest of their lives. One day, they will report to a job where their ability to follow rules will dictate their success.

It's more effective to reward your child for being "good" (appropriate) than to punish him for being "bad" (inappropriate).

Children fare better when expectations on them are clear and firm.

Removing a child from a traumatic environment does not remove the trauma from the child's memory.

Whining and crying are employed by kids for the purpose of getting something. If it works, then it was worth the effort and will be repeated.

"Unexpressed feeling never die. They are buried alive and come back later in ugly ways." (Stephen Covey)

Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

Wouldn't it be nice if children would simply listen and learn.

Learn more.

Dealing with Temper Tantrums

No two children are the same. There are no universal disciplinary techniques that apply to all children. There are however, some general principles to keep in mind:

  1. tantrums are normal in young children
  2. tantrums are vehicles to teach valuable life long lessons
  3. children manifest tantrums most often:

a) when their wishes are not met

b) when they are tired or hungry

4. your appropriate response is critical and will determine if your child learns those valuable

lessons

5. your response should be determined by an analysis of the circumstances – what is your child

trying to  achieve by the tantrums  eg. attention seeking, expressing frustration or anger,

trying to avoid a responsibility, social control, reversing the “no” word, sick, fear, etc., etc.)

6. if the child is successful in achieving his/her “goal”, the tantrum was reinforced and the

probability of another tantrum has been increased

7. if the child is unsuccessful in achieving his / her “goal” the tantrum was NOT reinforced and

the probability of another tantrum has been reduced.

8. tantrum behaviour can often be traced directly to an adult’s pattern of giving in to the child’s

wishes as soon as the tantrum behaviour becomes “intolerable”.

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ Lick Your Kids

  “Lick Your Kids” (figuratively not literally) (2 hours) First […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ Taming a Toddler

Many parents wonder what hit them when their sweet little baby turns into an unreasonable toddler – ideas for dealing with mealtime, bedtime, temper tanturms, toilet training, noncompliance, etc.

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“Our daughter was the joy of our life until she turned 13, then all hell broke loose. Rick helped us understand what was happening to her and we made some adjustments that helped us get through it. She’s now in University and doing well.”

(D.A. – St. Thomas)