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Children do not develop on their own - they only develop within relationships.

Whining and crying are employed by kids for the purpose of getting something. If it works, then it was worth the effort and will be repeated.

It's more effective to reward your child for being "good" (appropriate) than to punish him for being "bad" (inappropriate).

If there is no relationship - nothing else matters !

Many clinicians find it easier to tell parents their child has a brain-based disorder than suggest parenting changes. Jennifer Harris (psychiatrist)

The quickest way to change your child’s behaviour is to first change your own.

Adolescence can be the cruelest place on earth. It can really be heartless.  ( Tori Amos)

Hurt people hurt people.

"Rules without relationship leads to rebellion" (Josh McDowell)

"Moody" and "unpredictable" are adjectives parents will often use when referring to their teenagers.

Learn more.

Toilet Training (part 2)

 

 

As I stated in my previous blog many toilet training difficulties are really non problems. They stem from either:

  • unrealistic expectations
  • misleading advice

A child’s neurological and physiological “systems” must be sufficiently developed in order to gain control of his bladder and bowels and there is a wide variation of ages when these 2 systems converge to make toilet training successful.

At around 18 months of age the child’s reflex control begins to weaken and voluntary control begins to take over. At about 24 months, the sensation of impending urine release becomes apparent to the child and he / she may be able to give you about a 10 second warning. Over the next months the warning time increases and by about 30 months approximately 2/3 of children will be dry most of the time. Generally speaking girls train earlier and more easily than boys because of:

  • advanced rate of development
  • different anatomy
  • generally more compliant

Soon after day time control is achieved, night time control will hopefully happen (an upcoming blog will feature bed-wetting concerns)

The important point to remember is that there is a great variation in age when children are ready to begin toilet training.

YOU CAN’T GO FAR WRONG:

  1. IF YOU DON’T START TOO EARLY
  2. IF YOU DON’T FORCE THE CHILD
  3. IF YOU DON’TPANIC

My next posting will outline a training regime that is conducive to a non stressful, successful outcome.

What parents need most is ideas because with ideas we get options.

Rick Harper has been providing ideas to parents for over 40 years.

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This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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