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If it  was going to be easy to raise kids, it never would have started with something called "labour".

Parents are the external regulator for kids who cannot regulate themselves.

"Rules without relationship leads to rebellion" (Josh McDowell)

Setting limits teaches your children valuable skills they will use the rest of their lives. One day, they will report to a job where their ability to follow rules will dictate their success.

We should not medicate the boys so they fit the school; we should change the school to fit the boy. (Leonard Sax, M.D. Ph.D)

Removing a child from a traumatic environment does not remove the trauma from the child's memory.

Children mimic well. They catch what they see better than they follow what they hear.

The mistake that Sharon and I both made is we never set any boundaries.  (Ozzy Osbourne)

Some hope their children will be like sponges soaking up the truth and wisdom imparted by their parents. However appealing this philosophy might be, it seldom seems to catch on with their children.

The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

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Tactics for Temper Tantrums (part 10)

    Determine the Type of Tantrum Tantrums come in 2 varieties: “development” and “manipulative. The terrible two’s is all about the “developmental” type. These are typically very intense as the child literally has lost control of himself. With increasing age, this type usually gives way to the “manipulative” tantrum that typically has less intensity and more of a conscious, planned quality. It is not always easy to distinguish between the two types. The reaction […]

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Tactics for Temper Tantrums (part # 9)

    Early Intervention Intervene early, either before the tantrum starts or as soon as possible after it starts. Most children do not go from behaving appropriately to having a tantrum in a matter of seconds. More often, they first engage in inappropriate behaviours such as talking back, crying, whining or yelling. In most cases, you probably know when a tantrum is about to occur. Whenever you have the gut feeling that IT is about […]

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Tactics for Temper Tantrums (part 8)

    Concession Sometimes nothing works. And sometimes for reasons of sheer equality or common sense or both, the parent finds it necessary to concede. After all, we’re not our childlren’s adversaries; we’re their advocates. Sometimes, both interests are seerved by giving in. Giving in to a tantrum now and then will not foster a juvenile delinquent. Is the damage done by one extra cookie worth half an hour of wear and tear on both […]

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Tactics for Temper Tantrums (part 7)

    Retreat Sometimes there is nothing else but to retreat. Let the child know you will absolutely not be drawn in. This approach is justified when the stimulus to the tantrum is so absurd that it is not worth any effort  (such as the one that frequently occurs when someone fails to cut the sandwich in precisely the correct size pieces). No parent should be expected to wasted much imaginative effort on such minuscule […]

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Tactics for Temper Tantrums (part 6)

Diversionary Tactic Try to divert the child’s interest to something else. Pick up his favourite book and offer to read, or bring him a toy he likes. Children, especially young ones, have such short attention spans that they can often be distracted from their own performances. If this doesn’t work, try sitting down and actively playing with one of the child’s toys yourself. Make comments like, “Gee, I’d forgotten how much fun this puzzle is. […]

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“Our psychiatrist recommended Rick to help us sort out behaviour management issues for our autistic son. He was an invaluable help.”

(C.C. – Sarnia)