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It's more effective to reward your child for being "good" (appropriate) than to punish him for being "bad" (inappropriate).

"The thing that impresses me most about North America is the way parents obey their children"    (King Edward VII , 1841-1910)

Many clinicians find it easier to tell parents their child has a brain-based disorder than suggest parenting changes. Jennifer Harris (psychiatrist)

"Rules without relationship leads to rebellion" (Josh McDowell)

If there is no relationship - nothing else matters !

It is what we say and do when we're angry that creates the very model our children will follow when dealing with their own frustrations.

The mistake that Sharon and I both made is we never set any boundaries.  (Ozzy Osbourne)

Don't wait for him to turn 10 before you reveal that you are not in fact the hired help whose job it is to clean up after him.

Early intervention is always better than crisis management - but it is never too late to do the right thing.

When a child is disregulated - is the time parents need to be regulated.

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Tactics for Tantrums (Part 2)

 

 

Tactic # 3

The “I” Approach

This method is related to the previous “I Feel” technique. For the child who is more verbal and beginning to reason, a simple explanation of the parent’s feelings often help; for example, “It makes me unhappy (or uneasy, nervous, angry, upset) to see you act like this.”

This provides another context  for encouraging expression of feelings in terms of “I”. That is, there is more than a shade of difference between the comment “You are acting foolish and making me unhappy (which labels the child’s motive as bad and unhealthy) and a comment such as “When I see this I feel unhappy” ( which puts the label on the the parent where it belongs). The parent can also suggest that if the child ceases this behaviour, she will make the parent feel better and happier. This demonstrates to the child that there are other feelings to consider and that she is capable of improving another’s mood by a change in her own actions.

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ Lick Your Kids

  “Lick Your Kids” (figuratively not literally) (2 hours) First […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ Taming a Toddler

Many parents wonder what hit them when their sweet little baby turns into an unreasonable toddler – ideas for dealing with mealtime, bedtime, temper tanturms, toilet training, noncompliance, etc.

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See more of our workshops


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2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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