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When a child is disregulated - is the time parents need to be regulated.

Children mimic well. They catch what they see better than they follow what they hear.

It is what we say and do when we're angry that creates the very model our children will follow when dealing with their own frustrations.

Removing a child from a traumatic environment does not remove the trauma from the child's memory.

If there is no relationship - nothing else matters !

Whining and crying are employed by kids for the purpose of getting something. If it works, then it was worth the effort and will be repeated.

"Parents aren't the cause of ADHD, but they are part of the solution." (Kenny Handleman, M.D.)

"The thing that impresses me most about North America is the way parents obey their children"    (King Edward VII , 1841-1910)

Simple rules adhered to when children are young can prevent more serious problems later.

The quickest way to change your child’s behaviour is to first change your own.

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Setting Limits with Teenagers

 

Setting Limits with Teenagers !

A teenager’s job description includes being:

  1. impulsive
  2. rebellious
  3. style-obsessed
  4. irritable
  5. incommunicative
  6. peer centered
  7. risk taker
  8. sleep deprived

While judgment skills are developing, he needs parents to keep him safe by setting clear limits backed up with fair, reasonable, firm and consistent consequences.

  • Balanced limits builds trust between parents and teens – you need to find a balance between your need for control and your teen’s needs for independence.
  • Every teen is different. Figure out where your teen is – some need a lot of structure, other’s don’t.
  • Let your teen help create the rules – teens are much more likely to obey rules and limits that they help to create.
  • Work together on consequences
    •  there must be a price for stepping out of line,
    •  working together in advance prevents many bad feelings
  • Prepare yourself for your teen’s mistakes
    • all teens make mistakes, that’s how they learn
    • mom/dad – keep your emotions in check
    • briefly and calmly explain your disappointment, anger, frustration, fears
    • enforce the agreed upon consequences

When things are going well (hopefully most of the time) be sure to tell her you noticed (everyone likes a pat own the back)

 

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ Lick Your Kids

  “Lick Your Kids” (figuratively not literally) (2 hours) First […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ Taming a Toddler

Many parents wonder what hit them when their sweet little baby turns into an unreasonable toddler – ideas for dealing with mealtime, bedtime, temper tanturms, toilet training, noncompliance, etc.

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“Rick’s approach is so logical. He helped us clearly define the problem, analyze what has happened and select the best strategy. We now feel empowered to do something positive for our kid”

(A.N. – Tillsonburg)