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When a child is disregulated - is the time parents need to be regulated.

Parents are the external regulator for kids who cannot regulate themselves.

Children do not develop on their own - they only develop within relationships.

If you are headed in the wrong direction as a parent - you are allowed to make a U-turn.

"Parents aren't the cause of ADHD, but they are part of the solution." (Kenny Handleman, M.D.)

Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

A tantruming toddler is a little ball of writhing muscle and incredible strength. It's like trying to carry a greased pig past a slop bucket.

We should not medicate the boys so they fit the school; we should change the school to fit the boy. (Leonard Sax, M.D. Ph.D)

Children today are under enormous pressures rarely experienced by their parents or grandparents. Many of today's children are being enticed to grow up too quickly and are encountering challenges for which they are totally unprepared.

"Moody" and "unpredictable" are adjectives parents will often use when referring to their teenagers.

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Caregiving – FASD (part 3)

3 steps to managing children with FASD

a) Recognize that FASD is a medical condition

– FASD is not a bad attitude

– it must be treated as a medical condition

– society has denied this reality of FASD and blames the indivivual

– “just sit down and behave” is unrealistic

– punishing a child with FASD for brain damage is useless

– society (homes, schools, treatment centres, hospitals, jail) seldom provide adequate                                          supports

– children with visible handicaps receive more supports

b)  Involve the individual with FASD in their management as early as possible

– often caregivers shield the individual from their diagnosis  – shame, guilt

– best if the individual knows the truth

– care must be taken to not remove responsibility from the child for his actions (this is a                                      delicate balancing act)

c) Discard or modify treatments that have previously failed

– the “usual” interventions fail because individuals with FASD cannot learn in the time                                    given to them

– the individual lacks impulse control. boundaries, etc.

– interventions are too short term – caregivers give up too soon

– schools try to “mainstream” when the child is unable to cope behaviourally or                                                   socially

There is no single approach that is best for all FASD children!

Whatever approach is used, compassion is vital but it can become lost in the day to day struggles, challenges, failures and misbehaviours.

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“Our psychiatrist recommended Rick to help us sort out behaviour management issues for our autistic son. He was an invaluable help.”

(C.C. – Sarnia)