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The teenage years require a delicate balance between the young person's need to gain independence, and the parent's need to retain authority.

If you (parents) tend to overreact to your child's misbehaviour - your child learns that he can't trust you. Mom, Dad, stay regulated!

Adolescence can be the cruelest place on earth. It can really be heartless.  ( Tori Amos)

Hurt people hurt people.

Early intervention is always better than crisis management - but it is never too late to do the right thing.

"To be a man, a boy must see a man."  (J.R. Moehringer)

Many clinicians find it easier to tell parents their child has a brain-based disorder than suggest parenting changes. Jennifer Harris (psychiatrist)

"Unexpressed feeling never die. They are buried alive and come back later in ugly ways." (Stephen Covey)

"The thing that impresses me most about North America is the way parents obey their children"    (King Edward VII , 1841-1910)

If it  was going to be easy to raise kids, it never would have started with something called "labour".

Learn more.

Toilet Training (part 2)

 

 

As I stated in my previous blog many toilet training difficulties are really non problems. They stem from either:

  • unrealistic expectations
  • misleading advice

A child’s neurological and physiological “systems” must be sufficiently developed in order to gain control of his bladder and bowels and there is a wide variation of ages when these 2 systems converge to make toilet training successful.

At around 18 months of age the child’s reflex control begins to weaken and voluntary control begins to take over. At about 24 months, the sensation of impending urine release becomes apparent to the child and he / she may be able to give you about a 10 second warning. Over the next months the warning time increases and by about 30 months approximately 2/3 of children will be dry most of the time. Generally speaking girls train earlier and more easily than boys because of:

  • advanced rate of development
  • different anatomy
  • generally more compliant

Soon after day time control is achieved, night time control will hopefully happen (an upcoming blog will feature bed-wetting concerns)

The important point to remember is that there is a great variation in age when children are ready to begin toilet training.

YOU CAN’T GO FAR WRONG:

  1. IF YOU DON’T START TOO EARLY
  2. IF YOU DON’T FORCE THE CHILD
  3. IF YOU DON’TPANIC

My next posting will outline a training regime that is conducive to a non stressful, successful outcome.

What parents need most is ideas because with ideas we get options.

Rick Harper has been providing ideas to parents for over 40 years.

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“Implementing Rick’s techniques and adhering to them is exhausting, but it is a healthy exhaustion rather than the detrimental exhaustion I used to experience.”

(B.F. – Woodstock)