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The teenage years require a delicate balance between the young person's need to gain independence, and the parent's need to retain authority.

A tantruming toddler is a little ball of writhing muscle and incredible strength. It's like trying to carry a greased pig past a slop bucket.

The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice. (Peggy O'Mara)

Simple rules adhered to when children are young can prevent more serious problems later.

If you (parents) tend to overreact to your child's misbehaviour - your child learns that he can't trust you. Mom, Dad, stay regulated!

If you are headed in the wrong direction as a parent - you are allowed to make a U-turn.

Parents are the external regulator for kids who cannot regulate themselves.

Hurt people hurt people.

When a child is disregulated - is the time parents need to be regulated.

If there is no relationship - nothing else matters !

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Symptoms of “Executive Dysfunction”

These are the kinds of things that make living with or working with an ADHD child challenging.

  • lack of foresight (unable to predict consequences for his/her behaviour)
  • poor hindsight (“Johnny, how many times do I have to tell you to  . . . )
  • live for the minute (the future and past do not exist)
  • poor organization (unable to “get it together” in A.M.)
  • trouble returning to a task (“Johnny, you never complete anything”)
  • poor sense of time (“Johnny, you can’t spend 1 hour on the first 2 questions”)
  • time moves too slowly (“Are we almost there?”)
  • poor self talk (“Johnny, what were you thinking)
  • poor sense of self awareness (answer to above question – “I don’t have a clue”)
  • poor internalization and generalization of rules (“Why do I have to tell you the same thing over and over”)
  • poor reading of social clues (“Johnny, can’t you see that the other children think that’s weird”)
  • inconsistent work and behaviour (“Johnny, if you could do it well yesterday, why is today so horrible”)
  • trouble with transitions (“Johnny, why do you curse at me when I’m just calling you for dinner”)
  • hyper focused at times (“When Johnny is on the computer, I can’t get him off”)
  • poor frustration tolerance (“Johnny, it’s no big deal. Just get over it”)
  • frequently overwhelmed (“Stop, stop, I can’t stand it”)
  • angry (quickly and frequently)
  • push away those trying to help
  • over reacting (but it’s really over feeling)
  • inflexible, explosive reactions
  • thrill seeking behaviours
  • trouble paying attention to others
  • trouble making and keeping friends
  • sense of failure to achieve goals

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“We are foster parents who took in a 13 year old girl (going on 18!) and she ran us through the wringer. Rick helped us learn how to set limits that made the difference.”

(G.E. – Strathroy)