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Some hope their children will be like sponges soaking up the truth and wisdom imparted by their parents. However appealing this philosophy might be, it seldom seems to catch on with their children.

If there is no relationship - nothing else matters !

Many clinicians find it easier to tell parents their child has a brain-based disorder than suggest parenting changes. Jennifer Harris (psychiatrist)

"The thing that impresses me most about North America is the way parents obey their children"    (King Edward VII , 1841-1910)

The quickest way to change your child’s behaviour is to first change your own.

Children mimic well. They catch what they see better than they follow what they hear.

"Moody" and "unpredictable" are adjectives parents will often use when referring to their teenagers.

Removing a child from a traumatic environment does not remove the trauma from the child's memory.

Hurt people hurt people.

Setting limits teaches your children valuable skills they will use the rest of their lives. One day, they will report to a job where their ability to follow rules will dictate their success.

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Dealing with Temper Tantrums

No two children are the same. There are no universal disciplinary techniques that apply to all children. There are however, some general principles to keep in mind:

  1. tantrums are normal in young children
  2. tantrums are vehicles to teach valuable life long lessons
  3. children manifest tantrums most often:

a) when their wishes are not met

b) when they are tired or hungry

4. your appropriate response is critical and will determine if your child learns those valuable

lessons

5. your response should be determined by an analysis of the circumstances – what is your child

trying to  achieve by the tantrums  eg. attention seeking, expressing frustration or anger,

trying to avoid a responsibility, social control, reversing the “no” word, sick, fear, etc., etc.)

6. if the child is successful in achieving his/her “goal”, the tantrum was reinforced and the

probability of another tantrum has been increased

7. if the child is unsuccessful in achieving his / her “goal” the tantrum was NOT reinforced and

the probability of another tantrum has been reduced.

8. tantrum behaviour can often be traced directly to an adult’s pattern of giving in to the child’s

wishes as soon as the tantrum behaviour becomes “intolerable”.

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“You have changed our life! Thanks, it needed changing!”

(T.N. – London)